There was a religious man named Paul. He was what you would call a “Hebrew of Hebrews”. Everyone knew who he was and what he stood for. He was advancing in Judaism beyond many of his own age among his people; so extremely zealous he was for the traditions of his fathers. He loved the law that the Hebrew people were under and when a man came preaching a different message he hated him and sought to destroy everything he stood for.
I was a religious girl and my name is Kayla. I was what you would call the perfect little goodytoshoe Christian girl who had it all together all the time. Everyone knew who I was and what I stood for. My peers knew not to ask me to parties because I would say no, boys didn’t ask me out because they knew I took dating seriously. I loved living my life bound by the rules that a “good girl” lives by: don’t drink, don’t cuss, don’t flirt around with guys, do well in school, talk about Jesus when it makes you look good, pray before meals, etc)
Paul started out on a journey to a place called Damascus. There he had an encounter with Jesus Christ. He appeared to Paul blinding him and speaking to him. Paul came to realize through this divine encounter that all of which he had been living for, all these laws and rituals he had been living under were for nothing.
You see Paul had a heart problem. Because he was still a sinful person all those “good things” he had done were from a bad heart. When he did “good things” he did it so he would receive respect, boost his reputation, and give him the praise. He finally saw that all of those good deeds were as if he were taking filthy rags to a Holy and Perfect God and thinking it was enough to please him.
He saw for the first time truly how far he was from God and that there was no way to be reconciled with him unless there was one who could live the perfect life Paul could not.
I started out on a journey to a place called college. There I continued to live my “perfect life” and sought friends who thought the same way I did. I met these young women who also called themselves Christians and we became very good friends. As time went on I began to notice some differences between them and myself. For one they not only read their bibles but they actually studied them, everyday they sat down with their bibles and personally studied it on their own. I only picked up and looked at my bible when I wanted to feel good or write a verse for someone so I would look good. Another thing that was different was that since I was the “good” girl I didn’t associate myself with the “bad” people. People who partied and slept around and had foul language. I judged them and didn’t want to expose myself to their sinful lives. Yet these new friends had friends that were like that and they loved them, they prayed for them and tried to tell them about Jesus. That’s another thing I noticed was different these new friends talked about Jesus all the time and at first it kind of made me mad, after all I didn’t want to talk about Jesus all the time…but why didn’t I? After all I called myself a Christian and so did they but why was there such a huge gap between us?
Over time I came to realize that I was like Paul. I too was zealous for the rules I lived by and thought that they made me right with God. I had a heart problem just like Paul. Because I was still a sinful person all those “good things” I had done were from a bad heart. When I did “good things” I did it so I would receive respect, boost my reputation, and give myself the praise. I finally saw that all of those good deeds were as if I were taking filthy rags to a Holy and Perfect God and thinking it was enough to please him.
I saw for the first time truly how far I was from God and that there was no way to be reconciled with him unless there was one who could live the perfect life I could not. And it is here that Paul and I both saw the gospel for the first time. For the wages of sin is death but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord. That God made him who knew no sin to be sin so that we would be made right with God. God shows his love in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.
We had to see that we could not be made right with God on our own and we had to trust in Christ’s act on the cross, that he had taken on our sins and died for them. He took on our dirtiness so that when God looked at us he see his Son on a cross and sees us clothed in Christ’s righteousness, not our own.
Once Paul saw the gospel truth he deserted his life of living for the Hebrew law and the very belief he sought to destroy he ended up being martyred for. He died because he preached this message to everyone all to God’s glory and praise, not his own.
Once I saw the gospel truth I deserted the life of the “perfect little Christian girl”. I began to love to read God’s word and study it on my own. Knowing that there is literally no difference between me and those “bad people” I once despised I love them all dearly and pray for them that they too would not live their lives captive to their masters, whatever that may be. I do love to talk about Jesus because he is the one who changed my life and the only reason I now preach this message to everyone all to God’s glory and praise, and not my own.
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